WHAT IS KHESED (חֶסֶד)?

In our Western paradigm, we often interpret love through a romanticised lens, reducing it to fleeting emotions and whimsical feelings. However, this obviously speaks to the state of our relationships in the West today, especially marriage, which is by very definition a covenant.

We say we love her, and we love him. But we also love our cats and dogs, and we love ice cream. The same word is used to describe our deepest affections for people, our fondness for pets, and even our enjoyment of dessert.

So what, then, is love—really? If it can be applied to anything and everything, does it still hold any true meaning? Has the word been stretched so thin that it has lost its weight, its depth, its essence?

In our modern vocabulary, love often fluctuates between intense passion, sentimental attachment, and mere preference. We speak of love as an emotion, something we “fall into” or “fall out of,” something dictated by feelings that shift like the wind. But is that all love is? Or is there something more—something deeper, more enduring, more anchored in action than in sentiment?

Contrary to the Western paradigm, the Hebraic understanding of khesed (חֶסֶד) is entirely different—it is not about feelings at all but about action. In the Hebrew mindset, love is framed within the context of covenant, which clarifies the statement,

“Jacob I loved, but Esau I hated” (Malachi 1:2-3, Romans 9:13).

This does not refer to emotional preference but to the reality of covenantal allegiance—I act on your behalf because we are bound by oath, and you do the same for me. God valued Jacob because he valued the covenant, while God rejected Esau because he rejected the covenant—and thus, rejected God. This is where the concept of loyal love emerges—a steadfast, unwavering commitment to the relationship.

The best translation I have found for khesed is covenant love, covenant benefit, or covenant loyalty, but it always involves covenant action.

But how do we keep covenant with God? How is this covenant love reciprocated in our lives? The answer is woven throughout Scripture: we love God by our faithfulness to Him and by our faithfulness to His people.

The way God’s love manifests toward us is through His covenant promises—His enduring faithfulness, His mercy, His provision, and ultimately, His redemption. In return, our covenant love towards God is demonstrated in our spiritual devotion to Him, our obedience to His commands, and our unwavering allegiance to His ways.

Ecclesiastes 8:2-3 provides a profound insight:

“Keep the king’s command, I say, because of your oath before God. Do not hasten to leave His presence, and do not persist in a bad cause, for He will do whatever He pleases.”

Keeping the King’s command is an act of covenant fidelity. Just as subjects in the ancient world swore fealty to their king, so too do we, as followers of Christ, commit ourselves to God’s rule. To hasten to leave His presence is to abandon our post, to turn from His ways, and to walk away from the covenant relationship. But to remain steadfast—especially when it is difficult—is the essence of khesed.

This concept ties directly to the spiritual practice of abiding in Him and in His Word, so that He may abide in us. Jesus states in John 15:4,

“Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.”

To remain in God’s presence is to continually seek Him in prayer, to meditate on His Word, and to live in daily obedience to His commands. This is our reasonable act of worship, as Paul writes in Romans 12:1:

“Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship.”

This covenant loyalty extends beyond our relationship with God; it is also reflected in our relationships with others. We are called to love what God loves and to be faithful to those He calls His own. This is why Jesus said, “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another” (John 13:35). Covenant love means standing by our brothers and sisters in Christ, interceding for them, bearing their burdens, and walking alongside them in their struggles.

Our covenant loyalty also manifests in how we engage with the world. If God is our King, then we must uphold His justice, reflect His character, and live as ambassadors of His Kingdom. We do not merely profess faith; we live it out in every sphere of life. This is why James declares,

“Faith without works is dead” (James 2:26).

Love—true, biblical love—is not just spoken; it is lived.

So then, let us not settle for a shallow, fleeting love dictated by emotions. Let us embrace the depth of khesed—a love that is faithful, covenantal, and unwavering. Let us abide in Him, remain in God’s presence, keep His command, and love as He loves, with action not merely with words. In doing so, we will walk in the fullness of what it means to be His covenant people.Love, in its truest form, is not a pursuit of perfection in another but a refining fire within ourselves. It is not about seeking a flawless partner, one who effortlessly draws love from us, but about becoming the kind of person who loves with depth, with integrity, with unwavering devotion. It is about choosing to love—not because the other is without fault, but because we have committed to love in spite of faults.

This is the essence of covenant love. It does not hinge on shifting emotions or mutual convenience but on steadfast faithfulness—a love that endures storms, transcends seasons, and clings to its promise when passion wanes and trials arise.

If our friendship with God is a covenant relationship, then our love cannot be passive, conditional, or fleeting. We are not called to merely receive His love but to mirror it—to love as He loves: sacrificially, consistently, and without reservation. Just as He remains true to us, we must remain true to Him. Our faithfulness is not merely an obligation; it is the evidence of our devotion, the seal of our bond, the living out of our vow.

True love, then, is not found. It is forged. It is not about discovering the perfect recipient of our affections but about becoming the best reflection of His love, so that through us, others may glimpse the divine.

There are plenty of witty quotes about temptation—Oscar Wilde famously quipped, “I can resist everything except temptation,” while Mae West teased, “I generally avoid temptation unless I can’t resist it.” Even C.S. Lewis got in on the humour, noting, “No man knows how bad he is till he has tried very hard to be good.”

But beyond the clever one-liners, the most profound quote on temptation comes from Thomas Merton, who warned that the real danger isn’t just giving in to temptation—it’s settling for far too little.

Scripture is clear:

• James 2:17: “In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead.”
• James 2:26: “As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead.”
• 1 John 3:18: “Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.”
• John 15:10: “If you keep My commandments, you will remain in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and remain in His love.”
• John 15:12-14: “This is My commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this—that he lay down his life for his friends. You are My friends if you do what I command you.”

Ultimately, all true love is an outflow and expression of ḥesed—the steadfast, covenantal love of God. This is not merely an emotion or sentiment, but a divine reality that shapes and sustains all genuine love. At its core, ḥesed is a love bound by faithfulness, a love that does not waver with circumstances but endures because it is rooted in covenant.

To love truly, then, is to live in the rhythm of covenant—abiding in God and allowing His words to abide in us. This abiding is not passive; it is an active dwelling, a continual communion where His life saturates ours. When we remain in Him, His love flows through us, not as a forced effort but as a natural outworking of His presence within.

Thus, all love begins with keeping covenant, and keeping covenant begins with intimacy—spending time with God. Love is not first about what we do but about where we dwell. As we draw near to Him, we are transformed by His love, and from that place of abiding, God’s love overflows to others—not as a mere duty but as the inevitable fruit of life in Him and as as a consequence, Him living in us.

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION

1. How do I currently define love? Is my understanding of love based more on emotions or on covenant faithfulness?
2. In what ways am I keeping covenant with God? Am I remaining steadfast in my faith, obedience, and devotion?
3. Do I hasten to leave His presence? How can I cultivate a deeper habit of abiding in Him and His Word?
4. How do I demonstrate covenant love to others? Am I reflecting God’s loyal love in my relationships with fellow believers?
5. Am I living out my faith through action? How can I put my love into practice beyond just words (James 2:17, 1 John 3:18)?

DEVOTIONAL PRAYER

Heavenly Father,

You are faithful to Your covenant, and Your love never fails. Teach me to love as You love—not with fleeting emotions but with steadfast commitment. Help me to abide in You, to remain in Your presence, and to walk in obedience to Your Word. Let my faith be more than words—let it be evident in my actions, in my devotion to You, and in my love for others. Strengthen me to be a faithful covenant partner, reflecting Your unwavering love in all that I do.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.